Licensed To Ill

Today's my birthday--yeah, thanks--and if it wasn't bad enough that I had to deal with the fact that I've now outlived Elvis Presley, I had to get my driver's license renewed, complete with updated photo. I dunno why--I haven't changed much since the last one (or so I keep telling myself)...but such is the law and despite my subversive world view I believe in being a law-abiding citizen. The last thing my youngsters need is their dad in the big house because he forgot to renew a sticker before he sped off to an all-night Shoppers in search of spare Huggies.

The fact is, eventually, I'm going to have to start driving more, even though I utterly hate it--I loathe driving so much, in fact, that even in the videogame "Grand Theft Auto", I have my character take cabs to his assorted criminal activities...

So I wandered up to the vehicle bureau on College Street with my mother and father, and, incredibly, I was in-and-out in about five minutes. Thought about getting some vanity plates while I was waiting (and thought I may have hallucinated the price--$500!?)...any suggestions for a father-to-be? PRD PAPA? BG DDDY? DADDYO? GEEK DAD (I like that one...although PASS ME might be more appropriate to the poor citizens of this province...)